Old Hurst UFO ‘was my guests’

Published: 9:35 AM March 30, 2011 Updated: 4:21 PM November 1, 2020

I CAN certainly give credence to Patrick Comte’s letter (March 23) with regard to his sightings of strange lights over Old Hurst.

Let me start by saying that I have numerous friends, some in high places. On the night in question, March 19, I had invited some friends ‘down’ for the evening. Having taken green tea (jasmine flavour) together and a right nice slice of my wife’s homemade parkin, my friends wished to leave.

However, they had told me that because of a five- spaceship pile-up this side of the moon, that they wished to go home by another route, but were worried about the Americans. I told them not to worry their ugly big heads over this, as I was a personal friend of the managing director of the Royal Air Force.

Having made one quick phone call, it was agreed that two fighter jets would escort my friends to 50,000 feet and away from our airspace. I wished them God’s speed, and they were gone.

For those who don’t believe me, come and see the lovely crop circle patterns that have been left on my back lawn. Furthermore, my timber decking has been burnt to a cinder.